Everything must change. Nothing stays the same.

So there it went. I dreamt about him. He wasn't really there in my dream but the dream was about him. I now am confused as to whether or not this is a sign from him that he is only there lurking around and still remembering me anyway or maybe my subliminal mind has just given birth to something I badly wanted yesterday. I'd like to think of the previous. The latter is a bit too scientific it ruins my happy thoughts, hehe.

I was in my apartment somehow waiting for my mom to come back. She has gone somewhere. My place looked like the one I once had in Korea where I was so high up that everything happening in the busy city street was an everyday spectacle. In the far corner by the glass walls, I could see a picture frame of me and my husband sitting on a small side table. I am alone in my room and waiting for someone and at this very moment, I am already confused as to who I was waiting for really in my dream. I remember just as though I am only dreaming it now that there was some emotional wave that has set in at this very moment. I knew I was alone in my room but I was expecting somebody to come anytime. Then his aunt appeared. I never did meet any of his relatives in waking life but in my dream she was there talking to me. She was a short woman and she was telling me about him who now lives with his wife. Yeah, that I know about I said. The conversation leaned towards the story of us all of a sudden. Then she asked me where the photo of our baby is. I reached into this box and then I instantly gave her the snapshot of our little baby while still in my womb. I smiled and spoke to her in a tone like everything was just part of the past and I no longer intend to add more to what already was. She smiled back at me and asked me: is your baby a girl? or a boy? Then I answered her with only a smile. I thought, I love my baby. I offered her a drink I remember and she came into the storage room with me. I showed her the available drinks and I had so much of it under my bed. Cans of sodas and even wine and beer. She preferred to have a soda and as I went to the kitchen to prepare it for her, I saw her look into the photos of him and I. I saw her standing there... doing just that.


I no longer want to interpret anything here. Everything is way too past to even put any meaning to. I am just soo overly emotionally stressed I no longer want to add anything more to it.